Welcome to Discover Belonging
BELONGING AND YOUR IKIGAI
Your Reason for Being
The need for, and the power of, a sense of purpose for our lives has become a prominent concept. Modern mankind has searched for the answer to the question "Why am I here?" from Viktor Frankl's Mans Search for Meaning (1946)to Rick Warren's The Purpose Driven Life (2002) and much before, in between, and after.
I believe before you can find "purpose" or "meaning" you must first find your "self". One of the instruments I have found helpful in discovering our "self" and guiding us toward the "self" we would like to become is the Japanese concept of Ikigai: Your reason to get up in the morning. I discovered Ikigai in an article by Chip Richards (https://uplift.love/ikigai-your-reason-for-being/) and further explored it in Hector Garcia's Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life.
The image of Ikigai illustrates four key questions that lead to four motivators that can power our lives and give us a reason to get up in the morning. The practical part of Ikigai is that it includes the fact that we need to make a living and that we need to produce something the world needs. The challenge of Ikigai lies in the other two factors: What You Love and What You're Good At.
How do we discover or create a "self" that can live successfully in this world? One of my sayings is that "Confusion exists where the answers lie deeper than the questions being asked." I believe we are often confused about our purpose simply because we haven't asked ourselves the deep questions about the beliefs, values and goals we have embraced (see Belonging and Identity). Before we can have a mission that we are passionate about and embrace a profession or vocation that gives us meaning , we must determine if we have made conscious choices about the things that shape our "self".
Most people have formed their beliefs, values, and goals by default rather than by decision. They have usually accepted these from their parents or cultures and not consciously thought about them. This is often a source of internal stress later in life when default beliefs, values, and goals don't seem to match with our actual thoughts, feelings, and experiences. We can be told the world needs another financial analyst, and we could be paid well for being one, but in our heart, we simply don't have a passion for it and cannot make it our mission in life. This is true for all our relationships whether physical, social, cultural or spiritual.
I ask myself the Ikigai questions often in Reflective Meditation (see Belonging and Identity). Is there a stress point between who I am or want to be and what I am doing with my life? Do my vocation (what I feel I should be) and my profession (the career I have trained for) align with the "self" I want to be or become?
One thing I have discovered that I am sure of: You cannot find self-fulfillment unless you first discover the self that you are trying to fulfill. You can choose the most admired vocation or the most recognized profession but real self-fulfillment depends not on admiration or recognition but on the alignment of who we are and how we live.
